When Loss Divides: Supporting Couples Through Miscarriage, Pregnancy Loss & Infertility in Calgary and Vancouver

Pregnancy loss and infertility don’t just impact individuals—they affect relationships in deep, often unspoken ways.

As a therapist offering couples counselling for miscarriage and infertility in Calgary and Vancouver, I often meet partners struggling with grief that’s not only overwhelming—but also isolating, even from each other.

In the aftermath of miscarriage, stillbirth, or repeated fertility struggles, many couples find themselves asking:

• Why are we grieving so differently?

• Why do I feel so alone, even in my relationship?

• What does this mean for our future—for the family we imagined?

  
  

These questions are painful, common—and important to talk about.

How Couples Grieve Differently After Miscarriage or Pregnancy Loss

One of the most common challenges couples face after pregnancy loss is the difference in how each partner processes grief.

• One partner may want to talk about it constantly, while the other might shut down or avoid the topic altogether.

• One may feel waves of guilt or sadness, while the other focuses on moving forward or being “strong.”

• One might experience the loss as both physical and emotional, while the other struggles with how to support but feels helpless.

Neither way is wrong—but when these grieving styles aren’t understood or supported, they can lead to tension, misunderstanding, and emotional distance.

Loss Can Create Distance in the Relationship

Many couples report feeling:

• Emotionally disconnected

• Misunderstood or unsupported

• Triggered by intimacy or conversations about trying again

• Unsure how to comfort each other

• Overwhelmed by decisions around next steps (e.g., trying again, fertility treatments, stopping)

  
  

In therapy, I often help couples name the grief that exists between them, not just within them. Naming it is the first step toward reconnecting.

The Grief of Lost Dreams

When couples experience miscarriage or ongoing infertility, they’re not only grieving the loss of a pregnancy or cycle—they’re grieving:

• A dream of what family life was supposed to look like

• A timeline they had planned

• A version of themselves as parents

• The ease and joy they hoped to feel in the journey to parenthood

That grief is heavy. And it can blur your sense of what the future holds. Couples can become stuck between loss and uncertainty—wanting to move forward but not knowing how.

Therapy for Couples Facing Pregnancy Loss or Infertility in Calgary & Vancouver

If you and your partner are struggling after pregnancy loss, miscarriage, or infertility, know that support is available—and healing is possible.

In couples therapy, we work on:

• Understanding each other's grief styles and emotional needs

• Rebuilding connection and trust

• Navigating hard conversations about family-building decisions

• Creating space for both shared and individual healing

• Honoring the grief and the love that co-exist in this journey

You don’t have to go through this alone—or disconnected from each other.

Support for Couples in Calgary and Vancouver

As a therapist specializing in pregnancy loss and infertility counselling in Calgary and Vancouver, I offer in-person and virtual therapy sessions to support couples navigating:

• Miscarriage and stillbirth

• Recurrent pregnancy loss

• IVF and fertility challenges

• Secondary infertility

• Uncertainty around the future of family life after loss

Grief is not a sign of weakness in your relationship. It’s a reflection of your love. With the right support, you can move through it together—with compassion, clarity, and connection.

If you’re searching for couples therapy for miscarriage, pregnancy loss, or infertility in Calgary or Vancouver, I invite you to explore what support could look like for you.

Your relationship matters. Your grief matters. And healing, together, is possible.

Reach out today for a free 15 minute consultation to learn more about how our couples therapist can support you and your partner. Click here to book today.